The Journal of Doug Ramsey

Hey, it looks kinda cool. And expensive.

And breakable.

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Oh dear lord. They're describing it as "magical". What, like "that magical time when you become a woman"?

(I'll be here all week, try the veal, tip your servers well!)

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I don't get your sense of humor. And "magical" jokes really don't suit me.

...Are you a hacker?

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Many people don't get my sense of humor. But yeah, the "magical" references Steve Jobs is making just amuse me that much more because of the people I know and things I've seen.

I am many things, but yes, I dabble a bit in that area.

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Oh, but you only need to be a little less clever. Or a little more maybe? What things is Steve Jobs saying?

...Are you a professional ninja assassin?

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The answer is always to be MORE clever, not less. He's talking about how magical the new iPad is, and how the last time there was this much buzz about a tablet, it had commandments on it. brb, barfing.

Good lord no.

Amateur at best. ;-)

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I know!!! It does.

Apple needs to start making medical equipment that looks all sleek and pretty.

I suggest iSpawn: the pregnancy test.

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iWank: the sperm counter!

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Good answer, I guess. Dude, I barely understand the iPod Touch; if it can reproduce my music, I'm fine with it. It looks shinny though.

Learn something every day.

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Not as funny but the iSweet: Diabetes Blood Sugar Monitor.

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Shiny alone is not a good reason to produce/buy something, in my opinion.

Notice the wink-y emoticon. Laurie and I study martial arts together at a dojo in the city.

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iBeat: heart rate monitor?

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iRoll: Wheelchair?

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Mostly I'm waiting for the "bigger and better" second generation model. The iPad Maxi.

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x-wildchild.livejournal.com

Dude, if that worked with my iPod, I would totally buy it.

iStoned for like, parents who wanna see if their kids are on drugs.

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I'm kind of surprised there isn't already an app for that, to be honest. Maybe because they haven't figured out how to slap a sensor on it.

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But...they are shiny! Shiny is good right? Not that I would waste my money there, but damn...shiny.

I did hear something about that I while ago. I think. Sounds like some pretty badass training.

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Shiny is good, but it is not sufficient on its own. I mean, look at Windows Vista. Bleh.

Enh. It's pretty normal, really.

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That's not shiny! Vista is like...a light bulb forced into one's eyeball. Yuck.

Martial arts are pretty cool, alright? Don't try to change my mind on that. With all the people in this place that know how to fight, I could understand if you felt as if it were a small feat, but not me, who still remembers the days with people that can't defeat ten armed guys with a plastic spoon.

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That's just a bad pun.

Why Apple? Why did you do this? What was so wrong with the "iTablet"?

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Also, re: the whole "the last time there was this much buzz about a tablet it had commandments on it", yeah, but at least THAT tablet had handwriting recognition!

/ba-dum-bum

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Are all old people this lame?

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x-wildchild.livejournal.com

Yeah, but I don't have a iPhone, I have a iPod and you can't load stuff on those, right?

They need to make the iLast or the iRise. Porn and like, digital viagra in the same device thing.

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Vista was like a very pretty marzipan coating over a cake made of stuff that only Cammie could potentially find appetizing.

Dude, I don't know anyone that could defeat ten armed guys with a plastic spoon. Except in a Jet Li movie.

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