So...

[xp_cypher]

So the doctors let me have my laptop back yesterday. And I spent the rest of the day catching up on the journals, getting chewed out by Dom, and trying to figure out what to say. Mostly, trying to come up with something that doesn't sound either passive-aggressive or whiny or overapologetic. Not so much success there.

I made a lot of mistakes in the past month or so. Everything that Nathan and Angie said in that post on precognition is true. I had no business assuming that my interpretation was the only one. I should have talked about it with someone, with _anyone_, especially Angie. I don't quite understand how she's managed to forgive me for not trusting her with this.

I'm especially sorry to those of you who had to receive 'good-bye' emails from me. I completely miscalculated and figured if I came back from the blood drive, I'd have plenty of time to cancel those emails. I was wrong. I was wrong about a lot of things.

I'm not looking for sympathy, because I know how badly I screwed up, and I figure the lectures and the yelling and such are well-deserved. I just hope that everyone can maybe forgive me for the numerous mistakes I made, and help me try and do better.

I'm sorry.

Comments

Re: ...

[x-tarot.livejournal.com]

Before you decide to dive back into the pit of depressive wallowing that you have been in, stop and think about our conversation Monday and what I asked you, and what that means.

You have a brain, start using it.

Re: ...

[x-cypher.livejournal.com]

Maybe...maybe you could come down here and we could talk again? In the realm of one of the promises I made you, and everyone coming down to lecture me Sunday, there's something we maybe should talk about. Not to mention it's kind of lonely down here.

Re: ...

[x-tarot.livejournal.com]

I will be down in a few minutes.

I have hot cocoa. Do you want any?

Re: ...

[x-cypher.livejournal.com]

That would be nice. With marshmallows, please, if it's not too much trouble.

Re: ...

[x-tarot.livejournal.com]

I think I can manage marshmellows.

Oreos?

Re: ...

[x-cypher.livejournal.com]

Please?