So...

Oct. 26th, 2004 09:39 am
xp_cypher: (miserable)
[personal profile] xp_cypher
So the doctors let me have my laptop back yesterday. And I spent the rest of the day catching up on the journals, getting chewed out by Dom, and trying to figure out what to say. Mostly, trying to come up with something that doesn't sound either passive-aggressive or whiny or overapologetic. Not so much success there.

I made a lot of mistakes in the past month or so. Everything that Nathan and Angie said in that post on precognition is true. I had no business assuming that my interpretation was the only one. I should have talked about it with someone, with _anyone_, especially Angie. I don't quite understand how she's managed to forgive me for not trusting her with this.

I'm especially sorry to those of you who had to receive 'good-bye' emails from me. I completely miscalculated and figured if I came back from the blood drive, I'd have plenty of time to cancel those emails. I was wrong. I was wrong about a lot of things.

I'm not looking for sympathy, because I know how badly I screwed up, and I figure the lectures and the yelling and such are well-deserved. I just hope that everyone can maybe forgive me for the numerous mistakes I made, and help me try and do better.

I'm sorry.

...

Date: 2004-10-26 02:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-tarot.livejournal.com
I never said I forgave you.

Re: ...

Date: 2004-10-26 02:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-cypher.livejournal.com
Sorry. My mistake. Again.

Re: ...

Date: 2004-10-26 02:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-tarot.livejournal.com
Doug?

Stop saying how sorry you are and fix the problem.

Re: ...

Date: 2004-10-26 02:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-tarot.livejournal.com
Before you decide to dive back into the pit of depressive wallowing that you have been in, stop and think about our conversation Monday and what I asked you, and what that means.

You have a brain, start using it.

Re: ...

Date: 2004-10-26 02:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-cypher.livejournal.com
Maybe...maybe you could come down here and we could talk again? In the realm of one of the promises I made you, and everyone coming down to lecture me Sunday, there's something we maybe should talk about. Not to mention it's kind of lonely down here.

Re: ...

Date: 2004-10-26 02:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-tarot.livejournal.com
I will be down in a few minutes.

I have hot cocoa. Do you want any?

Re: ...

Date: 2004-10-26 02:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-cypher.livejournal.com
That would be nice. With marshmallows, please, if it's not too much trouble.

Re: ...

Date: 2004-10-26 02:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-tarot.livejournal.com
I think I can manage marshmellows.

Oreos?

Re: ...

Date: 2004-10-26 02:51 pm (UTC)

Date: 2004-10-26 03:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-skin.livejournal.com
Doug... I know you've probably heard this from everyone and their brother already, and the fact that everyone else has is exactly why I haven't been down to say it in person, but..

Don't ever do anything like this again. Please?

Date: 2004-10-26 06:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-blink.livejournal.com
want a t-shirt? I made one for Paul after he got nuked and one for Shiro (but I'm too chicken to give it to him).

Date: 2004-10-26 06:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-cypher.livejournal.com
That would be very nice of you, Clarice. Thanks.

Date: 2004-10-26 08:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-sanfuaiyaa.livejournal.com
You made me a shirt? What's so bad about it?

Now I'm actually awake...

Date: 2004-10-26 09:51 pm (UTC)
xp_daytripper: (ooh shiny!)
From: [personal profile] xp_daytripper
I'll be down for another healing session in a bit. Once I've eaten. Besides, there's no way I'm interrupting you and Angie just now. Anything else you need while I'm up?

Remember what I said. Say your sorries, then try to do better. No point wallowing in misery since that achieves absolutely nothing.

And shut the rest of you. I know I'm a hypocrite. ;)

Re: Now I'm actually awake...

Date: 2004-10-26 10:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-tarot.livejournal.com
Doug and I are done talking. He was taking a nap for a little while - I have homework I have to finish and emails to send so that I can leap into being stupid as well.

All the cool kids are doing it...

Date: 2004-10-26 11:54 pm (UTC)
xp_daytripper: (you're in trouble now...)
From: [personal profile] xp_daytripper
Being stupid, that is.

I'll head down in a bit, give him time to sleep - I remember being shot well enough myself to remember sleep makes it hurt less. :P

Re: All the cool kids are doing it...

Date: 2004-10-27 12:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-tarot.livejournal.com
You know, after hearing from my roommate and boyfriend how much it hurts to be shot - I think I will endeavour to avoid it at all costs.

Re: All the cool kids are doing it...

Date: 2004-10-27 12:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-crowdofone.livejournal.com
Having half a building drop on your back is no picnic either, take it from me.

Date: 2004-10-27 12:15 am (UTC)
xp_daytripper: (Default)
From: [personal profile] xp_daytripper
Good idea. Guns BAD. And that's even without that whole leaving big gaping holes part.

Re: All the cool kids are doing it...

Date: 2004-10-27 12:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-tarot.livejournal.com
Calling a moratorium on my friends and loved ones dying.

Date: 2004-10-27 12:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-tarot.livejournal.com
I cannot see any of us really disagreeing.

Re: All the cool kids are doing it...

Date: 2004-10-27 12:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-crowdofone.livejournal.com
I am so very much in favor of that.

Re: All the cool kids are doing it...

Date: 2004-10-27 12:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-cypher.livejournal.com
I am very much in favor of that too.

Re: All the cool kids are doing it...

Date: 2004-10-27 12:56 am (UTC)
xp_daytripper: (wytchbrat)
From: [personal profile] xp_daytripper
No arguments from me. Besides, being dead's so passe...

Oh fuck, now I'm starting to sound like Monet. Scratch the not being dead thing - kill me now. ;)

Date: 2004-10-27 08:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] x-skin.livejournal.com
Total agreement here.
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